My inspiration: this wizard needs not an introduction
His inspiration: Aaron Behrens from Ghostland Observatory
How did we do? :)
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Sweet Skylar (6-7-03 to 10-23-10)
I have dedicated so many posts to this pup-she might have been my most popular blog topic. Some time around 9:00 this morning, we lost her. I had my hand pressed against her chest and felt her heartbeat slowly fade away. It was...well, I can't even think of a word to describe the experience. I will say that I feel grateful that I was here with her when she passed. Bobby and I were both on the floor with her petting her.
Her passing was both expected and not. I knew she had been fighting a brain tumor for over a year, so when she defied the 3-4 month life span she was given upon initial diagnosis, I felt that she might be invincible.
Because I don't have children, Skylar is all I have ever known in that capacity. I/we faithfully gave her medicine twice a day, fed her, bathed her, pet her, walked her, etc. I know I gave her a good life, but I am still left feeling guilty. When I came home from school yesterday, I told myself I would walk her. I never got around to it because I started working on other projects. I really wish I had taken the 10 minutes out to go on what would have been our final walk together.
I want to thank so many of you who have been great friends to Skylar, humans and animals alike. You have brought joy, laughter and friendship to us both. I still remember how Danielle's dog Ashes tricked Skylar out of her bedroom so she could tip over her entire food container and eat a month's worth of food. I remember how Katie's dog Gomez literally supported Skylar on a walk around Town Lake after she was recovering from anesthesia. Skylar was wobbling on the trail and Gomez walked right next to her, making sure she didn't fall. I remember Elric's dog Ladybird and how my dog would ignore all of the dogs all the dog park unless she happened to see Bird. They would both wags their tails furiously at each other. Then, Skylar would go back to ignoring all other dogs. I remember the good times with Ashley's dog Colby and how Colby showed Skylar how to sunbathe. I remember Davy coming to visit and our trip to Amy's ice cream with Sky where Skylar's whipped cream consumption surpassed my own. She kept licking her nose in hopes that another bit would appear if she licked long enough. I remember the first day Skylar met Bobby and when he bent down to say hi to him, she licked his cheek. Most dogs are fairly liberal in their kisses, but Sky would never kiss anyone but me. I knew then that Bobby was special.
Skylar was always the first to greet me when I walked in the door. I would see her standing near the window and she would be looking for me. When I came home, she would sit in front of me, demanding for me to get close enough to her so she could understand my day through the new and previously classified smells I acquired. When she was still alive, I would try to imagine life without her. I felt it would be a good exercise because I knew her time was limited. Today was the first day I came home and she didn't greet me. I knew she wouldn't be here because I was returning from the vet. I just didn't realize how impactful it would be to enter a house where she is no longer.
The house seems quiet now. There aren't any paws tapping against the hardwood planks. They say that time heals all, and I suppose it does. She was my first dog outside of family dogs we've owned. Skylar enriched my life is ways that I never even imagined. She was my constant companion through some of the more challenging times in my life. I will miss her beyond describable emotions. Loss is never easy, but I am having a particularly difficult time with it. A friend sent along this poem and I found it very comforting.
Rainbow Bridge
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing: they each miss someone very special to them who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; his eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together...
– Author unknown
Monday, October 18, 2010
Bear Skin Rugs
Hello readers (aka Mom and some rando stalker on the net who stumbled upon my blog),
You might think it odd that I, a tree-hugging bleeding heart liberal, vegetarian, Care Bear Staring kind of girl would be writing about bear skin rugs. Well, I'm not.
I'm writing about the day I ate my hat. It happened about 75 seconds ago. And it sort of has to do with bear skin rugs.
So Bobby and I are talking and having one of our many ridiculous conversations where it starts with him accusing me as suffering from Vanishing Twin Syndrome because I am left-handed. He suggested that I might have been born along with a small cyst with teeth and hair that once was my twin sibling. Disclaimer: DON'T GOOGLE THIS IMAGE-YOU WILL THROW UP IMMEDIATELY. A) Just to assuage any fear, I was clearly not birthed with such a disgusting creature and B) basically, the theory (which has been debunked) is that some left-handed people were twins...look, I am not a scientist. Read here if you are actually interested in this: http://neuroemotional.com/wb/pages/vanishing-twin-syndrome.php
The point is that I never had a twin; and if I did, it definitely wasn't a small disgusting cyst with teeth and hair. I digress.
The direction of our riveting conversation turning into creating a website for cute things (read: NOT that gross mutant twin thing) where users can summon objects they wish to see together. I am looking at Bobby incredulously and asked him, "Like what? Give me an example." He said, "You know, like toddlers on bear skin rugs crawling towards kittens." I immediate disregarded his example "In what world do toddlers exist on bear skin rugs? Who are you, Sarah Palin?" With my trusty Macbook in my lap, I said, "Look, I'll even prove it to you." I type in "toddlers on bear skin rugs" onto the search box and this is where I ate my hat.
I mean, COME ON! Have you ever heard of this? Me neither. But, apparently it's the number one freaking hit on Google. I swear Bobby planned this somehow. In any event, I was wrong, I haven't posted anything in my blog lately, so I though this madness was worthy of a post.
Good night, Neverland.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
It's been a while...
First and foremost, I am officially getting my PhD at UT. I passed my comprehensive doctoral qualifying exams (woo!) and now it's smooth sailing... Yeah right! It's actually research and work my life away until I'm too old to get a job, but at least I'll emerge with a fancy piece of paper and some nuggets of information. Like three.
Reflecting on P nasty (as I've lovingly nicknamed Prospectus), it was one hell of a ride. The student I was last fall compared to the student I am this fall seems like two different people. I have learned and grown and sweat and suffered and cried and stressed-then, I sang (eek) and danced and made friends and got hugs and laughed and played soccer and took baths and drank wine and did yoga and drank 7,578,678 diet cokes and gained 3 pounds. Or maybe 10. Whatever. The point is that it was a journey. The point is that one year is a long time. The point is that one year is a short time. The point is that I'm done.
And, all at once, my world has changed. For starters, my house has new beautiful floors. You probably can't tell from my crappy laptop camera pic, but they are lovely. My dog and cat are still trying to navigate them. It's funny to hear the tap tap tap of the pets' nails on the flooring as they approach. No more sneaking up on me, Tabitha, and attacking my shoes! Speaking of nails, I got a pedicure today. They, too, are lovely and were slightly less expensive than my floors. Also, my kitchen walls look green, but they are not. Just in case anyone is judging right now. :D
Other new developments: Bobby and I got a roommate (our friend Bryan). This is very new, so what I have to report thus far is: I live in a constant man-cave with feminine decor. Last night I forced them to sit down with me and watch Gossip Girl. I think they liked it, but were afraid to admit it. :) Bryan is an excellent cook and inspires Bobby to create culinary wonders, so my 10 lbs may stretch to 15 soon. At least these next five will be from home cooked made-from-scratch biscuits and not cortisol-induced stress!
I am teaching 2 new sections (one at UT, one at ACC). The grading is killing me already, but I love my students. I always do. It's so much fun getting to know 28 new students every semester so well that I remember every student I've ever had. I still remember some of their majors, interests, life experiences, too. I feel very fortunate that I've had such incredible students. Speaking of which, I would be remiss if I didn't mention the recent shooting at UT. What a horrific experience for anyone, and especially hitting us so close to home. A testament to my students, though. They seemed to possess compassion when reflecting on the experience, unlike some of the other responses I observed from other students and members of our community. A distasteful Facebook fan page was created for the student who committed suicide (Colton), and several of my students protested the page, arguing that his family and community needed prayers, respect, and love instead of what this page was representing. Another proud moment for me. A very sad day for UT-Austin.
I would like to end on a happy note, since I hope this is one of many posts for this semester. In my Mindfulness class today, my professor showed us a clip and a quote. I'm including both for whomever reads this.
"A human being is a part of the whole, called by us "Universe", a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest — a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. Nobody is able to achieve this completely, but the striving for such achievement is in itself a part of the liberation and a foundation for inner security." -Albert Einstein
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